Can (and Should) Long Distance Exes Get Back Together?
When you’re in a relationship sometimes they can end and sometimes they can end badly. If you have a long-distance ex that wants to get back together with you I’m sure you’re excited but you need to take a moment and think about it.
When they leave you can feel heartbroken and you can miss them like crazy. So when you hear that they want to get back together it can make you giddy and excited. The most important thing you can do in that situation is to take a step back. Take a step back and really think about what you really want to do in that situation.
Here are a few good tips to think about when deciding whether or not to get back together with your long-distance ex.
1. You Broke Up for a Reason so Don’t Forget it
The one thing people tend to forget when their long-distance ex asks to get back together is the fact that you guys broke up for a reason.
Whether that reason was cheating, falling out of love, too many broken promises, or something that caused your break up it doesn’t matter. What matters is that something happened, you guys broke up, and now your ex wants to get back together.
For a long-distance relationship, it can be even harder to make that decision. The reason being you can’t be sure whether or not your significant other is going to actually change what happened this time around.
The only thing you can do in the situation is to decide whether or not you can live with what happened.
You might be excited to get back together at first and a week or so down the line you remember how you felt when that instance happened or they start to act the same way you did that caused your breakup in the first place.
Whatever you decide just make sure that it is what you are going to be okay with down the road.
2. Remember Their Toxic Traits and the Things that Tore You Both Apart
Sometimes what tore you both apart wasn’t one single act but a bunch of different smaller things that wound up turning into a really big thing. Some of these things can include blatant disrespect, broken promises, other people putting a wall between you, or anything along those lines. For everyone what you can live with differs. Some people are okay with certain actions and some people are not.
For a long-distance relationship, these toxic traits are sometimes harder to figure out. This is because you spend most of your time interacting over the internet instead of face to face so finding patterns can be harder to discover.
Just make sure to not forget what happened during your relationship to make you fall apart with each other. It can be easy to forgive and forget until they do the same things that they were doing in the past. Always take as much time as you need to think it over.
3. Really Think About the Situation and Don’t Rush In
The best advice I can give you is to sit and think. Not just give it a quick thought but find somewhere quiet and really think about what happened and the choices you have to make.
The last thing you want is to get back together with your long-distance ex and find out a week down the road that you don’t actually want to be in this relationship again.
Save yourself and your long-distance ex from unnecessary heartache and just take the time. If you feel like they are pressuring you then you shouldn’t probably say yes to begin with.
4. The Choice is Always Yours to Make so Do Not Feel Pressured
Never and I mean never let someone make that choice for you. Whether it’s your family, your ex, or your friends it should never be their choice. There is nothing wrong with going to your loved ones for advice but don’t let them pressure you into making the choice that they want you to make.
This is your life and ultimately your decision. Take the advice from around you and what you are getting from your loved ones and consider it.
If you are getting mostly “no’s” than take that into consideration and if you are getting mostly “yes’s” than also take that into consideration. That doesn’t mean that your loved ones are making the decision for you.
It can sometimes be harder to not feel pressured when you’re in a long-distance relationship because you feel as though you are on a time limit to get back to them. The internet is good at tracking time and when phone calls were made and when text messages were sent.
These timestamps can put extra pressure on you to get back to your long-distance significant other and you should never let them. Always take as much time as you need.
5. You Always Can Get Together but the Question at Hand is Should You
It is always so easy to say yes. Saying yes means getting back into a routine that you are comfortable in and getting back together with a person that you are comfortable with.
You remember all of the good times that you had and you remember how much you missed them when you broke up. You have to ask yourself, do I actually miss them now?
That question is one you really have to think about. Do you really miss them now or do you miss the comfort and the memories? Do you actually miss who they were as a person and who they are now? These are questions you have to sit down and really think about.
These aren’t questions that you can just skip by or deem not important. These are important so ask yourself, should we really be getting back together?
You have a lot to think about. The only person who can make that decision is you. So you need to choose wisely. Remember that you guys broke up for a reason so you need to make sure that reason is something you can live now and trust that they won’t do it again.
Also, know that there were toxic things going on throughout your whole relationship as there is in everybody’s relationship so make sure that those weren’t a big factor to the breakup.
Remember that with a long-distance relationship, it can sometimes be harder for you to decide whether or not you should get back together.
There is a lot more for you to consider like can you trust them to actually change even when you are so far away or if you are only wanting to get back together with your long-distance significant other because you miss having that person to talk to on the phone all day and every day.
Never let anybody pressure you or make the decision for you. It is yours and yours alone to make. Finally, ask yourself those questions. It is so important that you aren’t getting back together because you miss the comfort and the routine you two had but because you actually truly miss your significant other and feel as though this is the perfect opportunity to get back together with them.
Never sell yourself short or get back together because you feel they are the best you are ever going to get because most of the time that is just not true.