How To Deal with Long Distance Relationship Depression? (Guide)

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It’s very easy to get depressed when in a long-distance relationship. This is brought about by various things. Sometimes, your partner will come home for some weeks or months, you get used to them being around, and then they leave.

Sometimes life happens, and you need them to be by your side, but they are nowhere to be seen, and there is nothing you can do about it. Other times you just need that warm embrace when the weather gets extra cold, but there is no one to embrace you.

It even gets worse when you are not on very good terms and every effort to solve your differences seems not to work. Despite your reason for being depressed, you don’t deserve to live with it. Below are some simple ways of dealing with feelings of depression for people in long-distance relationships.

1. Talk About Your Feelings

Talking about how you feel is one of the simplest yet very effective ways of dealing with LDR depression. Opening up about feelings of vulnerability is not easy, but it works like magic.

However, keeping quiet makes things worse. Just get someone you trust, like a friend or relative, and tell them how you feel. There are so many people willing to listen, and thinking that no one cares is only in your head.

The first person you should talk to whenever you feel depressed should be your partner. They are the ones who can understand you well because they have an idea of how it feels to be in a long-distance relationship, and they could be going through challenges similar to yours.

However, sometimes, you can feel like you need to talk to someone face to face. That’s where close friends and relatives come in handy. Just invite them for coffee or call them up and have a lengthy talk.

If you don’t have friends or relatives you can talk to, try looking for help from a support group, either in person or online. At least here, you will enjoy some anonymity and won’t have a fear of ridicule.

You can also interact with other people who are in long-distance relationships, and they can share some of the tips that help them deal with mental issues that arise when partners live far from each other.

2. Communicate With Your Partner Regularly

depression long distance relationship

Communicating with your partner can greatly help ease feelings of long distance depression. Although this can be difficult with different time zones, always talk to them any chance you get.

Fortunately, nowadays, you don’t have to struggle to communicate with someone living miles away, thanks to technological advancement. You can also be planning virtual dates over the weekend or when you both have some free time. You can Facetime during these dates, have dinner, watch movies together, and even play games.

The goal here is to keep in touch as much as you can. This will help you deal with depression and spice up your relationship.

You can also send each other care packages from time to time. This shows that you appreciate and are mindful of each other, eliminating negative thoughts.

3. Maintain Your Other Relationships

You can easily detach yourself from your friends or family when in a relationship. You don’t even realize it until your partner leaves and you are left alone.

If you have neglected your other relationships, try as much as you can to work on them. This includes relationships with your friends, family, and other people you interact with from time to time.

You will realize how fulfilling it can be and that you can derive joy by interacting with other people rather than your partner.

healthy long distance relationship

Some of the things that can help you create and maintain meaningful relationships with other people besides your partner include:

  • Going to visit your friends or family regularly and them coming to visit you.
  • Having dinner or lunch with friends or family frequently.
  • Volunteering.
  • Going hiking.
  • Attending Conventions.
  • Joining support groups.

4. Eat Healthily

Eating a healthy diet has been proven to reduce depression feelings. Although there is no particular meal that can help ease the feelings of depression, having proper nutrition is very good for overall emotional well-being. This includes eating food rich in vitamins, minerals, carbohydrates, fatty acids, and proteins.

Some of the foods that are very helpful for people with feelings of long distance relationship depression include fruits, leafy vegetables, whole grains, and white meat.

Some of the foods that should be taken in minimum amounts or avoided include caffeinated drinks, alcoholic drinks, deep-fried, or processed and refined foods.

coping sadness long distance relationship

Eating healthy foods is not only good for your mental health but for your physical health, too. It can greatly help a person lose weight, especially when combined with exercising regularly.

It is particularly helpful to be watchful of what you eat when depressed as it can make you develop poor eating habits such as overfeeding and taking junk foods.

5. Try to Enjoy Your Own Space

Enjoying your own space is not very easy, especially if you are used to being with your partner all the time. However, it is doable.

Basically, try to learn how to live without clinging to your partner or any other person all the time. By doing so, you will be fine, even when they are away. You will also be able to focus on your day-to-day activities.

However, don’t neglect the usual conversations. In short, find a healthy way of maintaining your relationship without feeling inadequate when your partner is away.

Additionally, try to understand that your partner may not be there to reply to all your texts immediately you send them, keep on calling you, or give you all the attention you would desire. They may not be in a position to do so, and understanding that will save you from depressing thoughts.

Also, discuss the end goal of your current situation. Do you wish to be in a long-term relationship forever, or will you work towards living together someday? It’s always good to set things clear to avoid disappointments later.

6. Try to Identify the Specific Cause of Your LDR Depression

how deal long distance boyfriend

Depression is often a result of a single cause or several of them. When in a long-distance relationship, it can be a result of several things. It could be that your partner traveled recently and you have been used to being with them for a long time, and the thought of them being far from you is not sitting well with you.

Also, it could be that you fear your relationship is not going to work since you are away from each other. Other times, you may have trust issues that make you have deep thoughts, causing long distance relationship depression.

Try to identify the cause of your depression and see whether you can fix it alone, with your partner, or with a mental health professional.

7. Take Care of Yourself

It is very easy to neglect yourself when depressed. Sometimes, you will know what you want but lack the energy and zeal to do it. However, try as much as you can to take care of yourself as no one else will.

And you don’t have to do something major. Taking a warm shower, going for solo dates or with friends, and going to the spa regularly is enough self-care.

Remember also to practice positive self-talk and try to get rid of self-criticism. Additionally, focus on your hobbies and engage in them any time you have some free time.

On top of that, be mindful of the information you read or listen to and try to avoid any negativity as much as you can. Additionally, be very conscious of any foods you consume and any product you apply to your body.

8. Set Goals

long distance relationship boyfriend depression

Setting goals and accomplishing them can greatly help you fight depression. It is very fulfilling to plan to do something and actually do it. It can benefit you, help you avoid idleness, and get you feeling productive.

When setting goals, ensure that they are specific, realistic, and attainable. And they don’t have to be big goals such as traveling the world in six months. Some of the simple goals you can set and accomplish include:

  • Eating breakfast every day.
  • Reading a specific number of books a month.
  • Seeing your health practitioner for routine checkups.
  • Limiting procrastination.

9. Avoid Staying Idle

Staying idle can greatly put a toll on your emotional well-being. It makes the mind wander, and most of the time, it tends to focus on the negatives, making long distance relationship depression worse. Always try to stay engaged by doing simple things like walking your dog, reading a book, or watching a movie.

Also, plan your day and write down everything you need to do to avoid staying idle. Of course, there are days when you won’t feel like doing anything and just want to laze around, but try to avoid that as much as you can.

psychological effects long distance

In simple terms, keeping yourself engaged will keep you from having negative thoughts, which are not very good when battling depression from a long-distance relationship.

10. Exercise Regularly

Exercising is not only good for the physical body but also for mental wellness. When you exercise, your body releases endorphins which kill pain naturally and boost your moods.

Create an exercising routine, and stick to it. Exercising regularly not only helps improve your emotional well-being but can also help you shed some pounds, if that is your goal. The secret here is having realistic goals and sticking to your exercise routine.

Yes, there are days when you don’t feel like moving an inch, but if you are to enjoy the benefits of exercising, you have to push yourself a little harder, even if it means doing something like walking or swimming.

Going to the gym is another good option. You can interact with other people and get motivated to work out.

You also get to do various types of exercises, including cardio and weightlifting, since all the equipment you need is at your disposal. Additionally, you can get help from an instructor if you don’t know what to do or have a certain health condition that limits you from doing some workouts.

Besides physical exercise, don’t forget to exercise mentally. Just like the physical body, the mind also needs some good workouts. One of the best ways of exercising the mind is by practicing meditation.

11. Get Enough Sleep

deal struggling long-distance relationship

Sleeping adequately is very effective when it comes to managing depression. Sleeping is not just about rest. When you sleep, you recharge your system, which keeps the body healthy and improves emotional well-being.

On the other hand, not getting enough sleep makes it difficult to think clearly and manage feelings, worsening depression.

Sleep and depression are also closely linked. Depression can interfere with sleeping, and not sleeping properly can be a sign of depression.

Some of the tips you can adopt to ensure you get adequate sleep include:

  • Avoid having long naps during the day.
  • Avoid using digital devices an hour before going to bed.
  • Limit the intake of caffeine a few hours before sleeping.
  • Go to bed and wake up at the same time daily.
  • Taking the lights down low and having a warm shower an hour before sleeping.

12. Practice Gratitude

When you are in a long-distance relationship, you can focus on the negative and forget to be grateful for the good things in your life. Depression can make you sad and overlook the positive things, which worsens your situation.

why long distance relationships depressing

By practicing gratitude, you get rid of negative thoughts and replace them with positive ones. You can start this by journaling alone, as a couple, or combining the two. Journaling is not only good for individuals but is also good for couples.

Other things you can do to practice gratitude include:

  • Writing messages or emails with your partner and highlighting what you are grateful for.
  • Talking about not-so-good things that happened between you but somehow brought something good along the way.
  • Talk about the love and kindness you give and receive from your partner.

13. Get Help From a Professional

Getting professional help from a therapist is very effective at easing LDR depression and sadness. If you have tried any other method of dealing with depression and nothing seems to work, it’s recommended that you seek help from a professional.

They will help you identify your exact problem and work on making things better. Remember, professionals have worked with people who have had similar challenges like yours and know the best way to help you out.

How do you know it’s time to seek professional help? If you can no longer control your emotions and feel like breaking down, don’t hesitate to seek help. Additionally, if you have turned to using drugs or alcohol, or are engaging in other unhealthy behaviors, it’s time to seek help.

However, it doesn’t have to get there. You can still seek help immediately if you suspect you have long distance relationship depression.

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